Happy New Year

I am not one for celebrating the coming of a new year with the fanfare of a party complete with party hats, loud tooting noise-makers, champagne and New Year resolutions. 

I am not sure why exactly, but I have always felt the best way for me to usher in the new year is quietly. For me it is a time of reflection similar to my birthday. A taking stock so to speak. Well, I guess I did not like what I was taking stock of this year as I had a mini (okay a bit bigger than mini) meltdown last night while talking to a friend. I can't really pin point exactly what the problem was except that I felt afraid. Afraid of another new year looming in front of me and me still uncertain of how to get to where I want to go, afraid of the work I know it will take to do it, afraid of failing, afraid of transforming myself yet again? 

My very understanding friend had these words for me (along with many others) "You are on a path and, although you are not sure where it is leading, you must have faith it is the right one. It is clearly one of transformation and that, in itself, makes it a good one."

"Faith" might be a good mantra word for me this year, but I have chosen another one. Two years ago my word would have been "survive" and last year "heal". This year the word "thrive" seems to be the right fit. I don't expect "thriving" will be easy, but I like the optimism in the word. I like the way it sounds like I will not be simply existing and going about my day to day living - I will be working toward something more. I want to experience my life with more joy and more optimism. I want to flourish! 

And so, with the New Year a new beginning:

"A new journey has begun. Let it be magical. Let it unfold. All parts of the journey are sacred and holy. Take time to honour the beginning"
- Melody Beattie

I wish you all a safe, healthy and happy journey for 2012.